i am really stupid. like hopstoopid stupid. i guess being dead once isnt good enough. my spouse tried to kill me in June, i think, maybe?
it really sucks. our tenth anniversary is coming up. 😦 we were going to get matching tattoos.
i am not sure what to do.
goddess?
Plastic Girl 
😦 what is happening dear? why you thoug that? if you feel sure about this…maybe is better take distance.
i did as you suggested. i achieved distance and stayed chill. things are getting better, albeit slowly. thank you for checking in on me. hope all is well with you
I am sad that you need go to that situation, i just hope all go better to you, if mean back whit your spouse in a good term wonderfull, if mean make your own way great hope the best luck and succes too.
My stuff, are going well, slowly, trying to dont fall again in self destructive behavior (like had sex whit men or couples)
the person my es-o is now, is not someone I can be close to. it’s the person she used to be that hurts so much to lose. we had a very special relationship.
take care for the now, Emi
If you need to talk you have my email.
I hope everything is ok. Please be safe.
hello Miriam, this whole adventure has become quite a time sink. I didn’t see this comment until now. sorry about that. I do have your email, thank you. I haven’t checked it in awhile. perhaps I’ll do that today. we will see.
I’m so sorry to read this. Prayers to the Goddess for your safety and mental clarity.
thank you very much. it’s an awkward place to be. I sure hope it gets better.
Uh, is every thing alright?
yes and no
😦 you are fine? i dont see any sign of you this weeks
im here! im alive! i am grateful 🙂
i am so sorry i couldnt get to these comments sooner. im home in my office and i will read the comments in my que, approve and reply.
i couldnt have got this far without help this time.
thank you
and i miss you, you, Emi and the others, you know who you are. 🙂
I am really happy that you are fine dear 😀
me too! thanks for checking in and commenting. have a nice day, Emi. 🙂
so I checked myself into a hospital this evening. ostensibly, i was seeking treatment for exhaustion from walking around aimlessly, going without sleep for the past five days and only eating a solid meal about once every three days.
I only needed eight hours of real sleep and a well-balanced meal to recover. my doctor discharged me back into homelessness with a clean bill of health and a a turkey sandwich. i have health insurance, and the ER was totally dead. no real reason not to let me get my healing eight hours of downtime.
they gave me some paper handouts for food lines. I mentioned that in my experience, being a pro sex-worker paid better and gave more pride than being a professional bum. they were indifferent. and here I am.
there doesn’t seem to be any way to get back to my place and get clothes, meds, or even my mail. Among my items from USPS, I am expecting a tax return. I can’t get any of these things. after seven days walking around home less without shelter, I’m tired. I can’t seem to get a safe space to sleep. Shelters put me danger and you can’t drop into any of them, they all seem to have waiting lists. I’ll be sleeping pretty much wherever my legs give out, and they’re pretty close. Lugging my bags around is starting to trigger my old neck injuries. fairly unpleasant. And my iPad charger cable broke, and I’m not sure i can afford to replace it…good times.
I’m sure there are others in worse straits, somewhere, so how can I ask for help? And to whom? My es-o is going to win this struggle because orders and I’m just out here losing weight, sleep, energy,.. I don’t even know what to do. For all I know he’s hoping that random fates will happen to me and that I will never come back.
yes. he did try
yes. you tanked it
yes. i got him
thank you. you know who. for caring enough to ask. i authorized the request recently. i knew. ❤